Guest Blog by Claire Isenthal, Author, The Rising Order
(Note: Every once in awhile, we receive a guest blog that demands to be read. Especially from a novelist and literary voice the book and publishing world will come to know quite well in the next few years. Enjoy this special blog from one of the best new writers in America.)
Hand by hand, rung by rung. Dragging. Heaving. Sometimes, crying.
I, like many, know what it feels like to pull myself to the top. Angsty sleepless nights. Exhaustion. Painful levels of investment that often aren’t reciprocated. I’ve done it before with my current career, and I’m doing it now with my writing career.
There’s been a different kind of energy and trepidation, however, while aiming for my dream – when I know, beyond doubt, that I’m being summoned by my calling. Maybe that’s because if I don’t reach that summit, if I fall short, a part of me won’t be fulfilled – the part that knows this is my chance to leave my paintbrush smear on the world.
The draw of writing for so many is the ability to hide behind a computer screen, a notebook, and words. There is something magnificent about sinking into an imaginary world, sketched renderings built on the foundation of how we process and experience everyday reality. Conforming to societal expectations and adult demands can discolor once vibrant creative inspiration. Let’s be honest, it’s hard to write under a rushed one-hour time constraint awarded only when my fifteen-month-old’s naptime rolls around, which also battles with a million other priorities like showering and/or stuffing whatever I can into my mouth. But when I can fit it in, I savor every minute. Writing revives those shades and crumbles those shackles. Writing is an adventure with every blank page.
While some might thrive behind writing’s screen of anonymity, for me it has been the most painful part of this process. Being around others gives me energy. As an Account Executive in sales, I have always been able to sell myself; finessing that has been a critical part of my success. Yes, people buy into products, but first they buy into the idea of you.
I know, I know… your writing should sell itself. But, as many of us have experienced first-hand, there’s a lot more to it. Luck and timing are a critical piece, and like in any industry, who you know will rocket you past a long queue of significantly more talented writers. I’ve received endless coaching and editorial assistance, attended a minimum of 30 different critique sessions with agents and editors, and paid for workshop after workshop. How quickly my imaginary world fell prey to the opinions and critiques of others, often with conflicting suggestions. Elements of my story became dissected and ripped apart, often with no foresight into my vision.
One piece of consistent feedback worth noting was the double standard held to women, even fictional women. I was told my female protagonist in my novel, The Rising Order, didn’t grab attention or lacked ‘something’. Don’t get me wrong, this is a fair critique, but when I pressed for more detail no one could articulate what it was she lacked. There seemed to be an expectation that my character had to be liked right away or had to WOW within my first chapter. Her complexity and lack of confidence was overlooked as a flaw, even though that’s the reality many of us face, especially when we’re young. Meanwhile, no one seemed to have a problem with my narcissistic, damaged, lethal villain, who also happens to be male.
When I first set out on my publishing pursuit, my own sexism got the better of me. I envisioned my future agent as a woman, one who reflected similar aspirations and values of my own. But the agent who ended up giving me a shot and believing in my work was a man. This man called my female protagonist brilliant and well-developed. He instantly recognized the potential this story had. Despite my misgivings, despite my self-doubt, he’s worked to land my manuscript on the desks of major publishers. Hopefully, in the not-so-distant future, he’ll also be right by my side when I pick my book up from a Barnes & Noble shelf and he tells me: “I told you so.”
Word Journeys guest blogger Claire Isenthal is thirty-one and has been sheltering in place with her parents, husband, son, and mutt for the past nine months. She is an Account Executive at a Fortune 500 tech company and has been in sales for seven years. Claire is currently on submission with her first novel, The Rising Order, and in the midst of writing her second, The New Order. To see more of her work, feel free to check out her website at claireisenthal.com or follow her on Instagram @claireisenthal.